Overwhelm: How to get out of the anxiety pattern when taking on new challenges
I was coaching one of my clients who had been dealing with overwhelm in many areas of her life. I asked her to imagine how it would be if she had a step-by-step blueprint to move her past overwhelm anytime she took on a new challenge. I got a huge YES, that would be amazing. No more feeling bad for not completing things. Feeling accomplished, having a way to break things down so she would be able to get started and then take each step until the goal was reached.
Well these are the keys to stop overwhelm. The pattern she kept running into in her life, was getting overwhelmed and then not getting anything done.
How to change the Overwhelm Pattern:
To change the pattern of anxiety and overwhelm it’s important to first identify one situation you want to work on. Just pick one situation where you feel overwhelmed.
If you try to fix every area of overwhelm at the same time, it will create more feelings of being stuck. So, step one is to identify just one area you want to change the overwhelm pattern.
Joan (name changed) chose a specific event when her anxiety and feeling overwhelmed was getting in the way. It was on a project she had taken on. It was challenging because there were many parts to it. Yet, once she had chosen the situation she was then able to use the action plan that took her through each step for meeting goals. Using the no-fail goal method for success. .
If you are someone who procrastinates, you will recognize some of the things Joan did that to put off doing the project she was working on. When she put it off she felt back about herself, which then got in the way of moving towards the of goal she wanted to accomplish.
Joan is very creative in many areas of her life. So of course she was also really creative with ways to procrastinate. She got so good at procrastination, that she didn’t even realize that she was doing it. Sometimes she felt compelled to do other “important” projects, clean the oven, organize closets, answer emails, all seemingly good ways of spending her time. Yet, these were just ways to move away from the anxiety she felt when she’d sit down to start on the writing project.
If you also find yourself doing all sort of things that take you away from your goals, stop and ask yourself: What are you feeling when you sit down to do the project? There are reasons why people procrastinate, and they are not the ones that many people think, it’s really not about as being lazy or not having motivation. It’s more about moving away from fear, or because more information is needed, or because negative self talk makes you feel so bad, it eats away at self-confidence. .
Using the no-fail goal method for success
1. Pick one project to start with.
2. Notice the feelings you have before you procrastinate
3. Notice any thoughts that make you feel bad.
4. Accept that we can’t do everything all at once.
5. After choosing one project, narrowed it down to one small part of a project.
6. Making a list of tasks that go into the project.
7. Picking one to start with,
These 7 steps will begins the process for stopping the overwhelm and anxiety.
Joan decided to work on one part of her job, transcribing audio’s for a workbook. She had been putting this off for months .In order stop feeling overwhelmed, she needed to break the task down into even smaller pieces.
I asked her if she would do ONE MINUTE a day on transcription. To check to see if this was a small enough task, I asked her if she would be able to talk herself out of doing just one minute. She agreed if all she needed to do is just one minute she would do that.
Even if this is all she can commit to, that is OK. Because at the end of the week she’ll have 7 minutes done. And if it turns out she ends up doing 2 minutes a day she would have 14 minutes of transcription done after a week. Although the goal is really small, she will still get the feeling of accomplishment each day, and in this way will have something done at the end of the week.
So you can see what I mean about setting goals that are no-fail. Even if the little voice that runs in the back of your mind tries to convince you not to do the task, it is easier to say I’m just going to do one minute. What will happen is that when you set the goal so small and do it no matter what, it gives you a sense of accomplishment which leads to motivation. And motivation leads to feeling good about yourself, and the cycle goes around in the positive direction.
If at any point you feel stuck, start again with the first 7 steps. For Joan, the happy news was that after a number of months of using this process, all of the workshops were transcribed. Starting with such a simple one minute step, lead to the full goal being accomplished. It sure works better than being upset with yourself and feeling stuck. Sometimes the very thing that is difficult can actually become a “gift” that you don’t even recognize until much later
To get more information on the online coaching group. Email Audrey by clicking on the link contact audrey.
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