Rapport
Hello again, I’m Tish one of the hypno-therapists at the Anxiety Control Center. I’ll be writing today about everyday occurrences and the importance of using rapport skills to get what you want. Something happened today that really reminded me once again of how important rapport can be.
This is actually a two- part post. Today I will tell you what happened and then in my next post, I will explain what rapport is and how you can use it.
I have been having a lot of mechanical trouble with my car. It seems like is has been in the repair shop more that it has been in my possession. Yes, that is an exaggeration, but the point I am trying to make is that it has been a frustrating journey with this vehicle.
Three weeks ago it had to be towed to the repair shop because it was making very strange banging noises and I didn’t feel safe driving it. After two days in the shop the technician told me that they had identified and fixed the problem. Three days later the strange, banging noises started again. So this morning I called road service to have it towed to the repair facility again. The tow truck operator called to verify my address and started the conversation with “so, you broke your car.” I realize that this was his attempt at humor; however, my frustration level with my car was pretty high at that moment. I calmly replied that I did not break my car. He continued with something like so how did you break your car. Again, staying calm I replied that this was the second time this month that there was something wrong with my car which required it having to be towed to the dealer because apparently it was not fixed the last time.
So what does this have to do with rapport? I guess a definition of rapport would be in order here. Rapport is many times defined by examples of how it is used. However, a good start would be: when there is understanding and agreement between people rapport is established, which builds trust.
So using the above situation that I described, if the tow truck operator started by gaining rapport and then injecting humor, I might have been more receptive.
For example:
Tow Truck Driver: I understand that your car is broken and it needs to be towed to a repair facility.
Me: Yes, in fact this is the second time this month it needed to be towed.
Tow Truck Driver: Wow, that must be very frustrating for you, two times in one month.
Me: You bet it is! I’ve had to change appointments and rely on other people to take me places.
Two Truck Driver: Having a car that is unreliable must really be annoying.
In the above example, two things are actually occurring. The tow truck driver is using another skill that we call, active listening and while doing so, is establishing rapport with me.. By the end of this new “conversation” I would feel like the tow truck driver understands my frustration and is on my side. Now if he wanted to say something humorous, I would probably be receptive to it and maybe even enjoy a good laugh.
In my next post I will go into detail about a number of different ways to establish rapport.
To claim your own copy of 2 powerful mind calming exercises.
Sign in at the box at the top right of this page